Cold Feet (Empathy in the PPNW Book 3) Read online

  The memories of the night swirled through my mind a little faster, making me think of the feel of his skin against my hands, the wetness of his mouth along my throat. I let out a small sound of anticipation, shifting to get to my feet, shoving him back as I did. His hands came up to rest tentatively on my waist as I leaned over him, forcing him to lie on the bed under me. Straddling his left thigh, I held my body above his, hands against the unmade bed. I left space between our bodies as I kissed him, pressing my thigh gently against his groin. He moaned a bit into my mouth at the pressure and I lost my mind just a little.

  Here I was, an average woman who’d nearly gotten herself stranded in a tunnel and covered in spider poop just hours before, a woman who could barely control herself around candy or pastries, and I had a werewolf pinned beneath me. I knew his strength was much greater than mine, that he probably could have snapped the heavy wooden bed frame with little effort, but here he was, bowing to my whims. I could feel his vulnerability in the way he touched me, in the way he kissed me. I could also feel that I was unequivocally in charge. If I stood up in that moment, backed off, and told him to get the fuck out, he would have done it without even a single breath of argument.

  Our relationship had never been quite like this before.

  Overwhelmed, I moved one hand away from the bed, our bodies still close but not quite touching. I slid my palm down his body, felt his erection through his jeans. I rubbed my hand over him through the denim. I felt the muscles in his thigh tense, heard his breath catch. I nipped his lip as I moved my hand back across his chest, sliding my fingers into his hair. Giving a little tug as I lowered myself onto his body, I hooked my other arm behind his shoulder to cradle his head in my palm.

  One hand at the small of my back, he slid his other to my arm, his grip gentle.

  We stayed wrapped together for a bit, kissing, keeping close but almost still. I could feel his heartbeat against my chest and it made me want to touch it, to feel it beneath my hand, to taste it along my tongue. Abruptly, I moved my fingers to his chin, turned his face away from me, kissed a line down his jaw and along his neck. I bit his earlobe, let out a small sound when the pressure made him gasp. Feeling the pound of his pulse against my lips as I kissed his throat, I let out an impatient breath, pulling back.

  He blinked up at me, his expression cloudy like he’d just woken up from a really good dream before he’d been ready to leave it. I smiled down at him, still feeling the glee of the power I held over him. Uncertainty touched his features as I paused to admire him. His hand fell away from my arm to drop onto his chest.

  In answer to the question in his eyes, I shifted to straddle him. Slowly, I pulled my shirt over my head, tossed it to the side. I watched him watch me as I pressed my palms to his chest, slid them down to his hips under my thighs to grab his shirt. Still silent, still watching as if he expected me to change my mind, he moved to let me pull his shirt off. I dropped it over the side of the bed, pressed my palms against his belly, digging my nails into his skin. Waiting until I’d caught his gaze again, I leaned down, pressed my lips to his.

  It was another test of intimacy, the eye contact as we kissed. After a few seconds, I let my eyes draw closed as I moved to lick along the other side of his neck, down to his chest. As my lips found the heartbeat under his breast, my hands found his wrists. I let my thumbs rest along the pulse points there too, before I moved his hands to my back, pressed them against my flesh. His grip was loose and I sighed against his skin as I moved to kiss his mouth again, cupping his jaw gently with both hands.

  Frustrated with his lack of ambition, I let out a snarl as I bit his lip. I was gentle at first but, when it didn’t make him react, I bit harder, aware that I wouldn’t have pushed it quite so far if he was human.

  That spurred him to action. I felt his fingers dig against my hips, slide roughly up my back to my shoulder blades. He pressed me against him as far as he could with my elbows between us. The fact that he couldn’t pull me flush against his chest made him growl and I felt the rumble of it through his body, against my groin. I smiled into his mouth when he shifted to part my forearms and shove them aside. Before I knew it, he was pressing me to him again, his hands moving along my back.

  He rolled, lifting me up off the bed enough with one arm that he could slide us both further away from its edge before he pinned me beneath him. I wrapped my leg around the backs of his thighs, shoving my hands between us to grab for the button on his pants. His body went tense and I felt him pull away slightly.

  “No,” I said, moving one hand to the back of his head to pull him in. I kissed him once, let it be long and slow before I whispered my plea. “Come back.”

  I kissed him again, my hand awkwardly working at the button on his jeans. As it came undone, Mel pulled back, the strength of my palm against his head be damned. He met my eyes, his lips parted, and I moved my hand from his hair to press up against his beating heart. My other hand, meanwhile, was still working on getting his fly all the way down. I would indulge his insecurity somewhat but I wasn't about to just give up. I was in this now, dammit. He’d been hounding me for over a year and I wasn’t going to let some succubus and her mind games ruin my chance at getting laid.

  “You’re sure?” he asked, uncharacteristically timid. I smiled, rolled my eyes.

  “Would you just fuck me?” I asked, giving the waistline of his jeans a tug to punctuate the order. I couldn't keep the smile off my face. “Otherwise, I’ll just kick you out and you’ll know you blew your only shot.” Ignoring the expression on his face, which was halfway between insult and amusement, I pushed up to kiss him again. I made the kiss rough, moving my hand away from his heart, down to finish the job my other hand had started. His mouth was more intense, this time, as if he just needed a rude bit of snark to convince him he wasn’t hallucinating, that I wasn’t some trick of the spider fae.

  Abruptly, he shoved my hands back, ran his fingers along my ribs until he got to my hips. Our mouths worked at each other, tongues dancing together as he traced his fingers along my skin, sliding them along my belly until he got to my fly. He was much more adept than I, undoing it in seconds before he pulled away completely. Curious where he’d gone, I opened my eyes to find him standing over me. Still, there was a hesitation there that I was beginning to grow weary of. He took his time, his hands gentler than I would have preferred as he slid my pants off. He twisted to toss them on the chair at the desk but, bafflingly, left my underwear on.

  I pushed into a sitting position, grabbed his pants and yanked them down, not doing him the same favor. I rolled my gaze upward, lifted a brow when I met his gaze from inches away from his cock. Breath coming quickly, his gaze searched my face, his eyes a touch wide. On a small smile, I leaned forward, hooked my thumb under the base of his penis.

  He let out a long sigh as I closed my lips, pressed forward, sucked back. I worked at him, hoping this would finally get the point across that I was, in fact, seducing him. Letting a small moan slip from my throat to hum along my lips, I varied the speed, keeping my mouth sealed around his flesh. As I heard his breath catch, I felt his hand touch my shoulder, still as gently as he’d done almost everything. Slowly, I slid back, moving my hands to the sides of his thighs, running my nails along his skin.

  As I did, I felt his hand move up to my cheek, his other hand mirroring the motion. He arched back, pulling his dick all the way past my lips, stepping back to prevent me from darting in and starting again. I looked up to meet his eyes, wondering what he was doing. He watched me with heavy eyelids, still cupping my jaw. I let my hands drop away from his skin and he kneeled down to eye level, slid his hands down my body toward my hips. When I didn’t get what he was hinting at, he leaned forward, pressed his mouth to mine hard enough that I was forced back.

  I felt his fingers dig into my hips then, before he slid me to the edge of the bed, pulling my panties off as he broke our kiss. Closing my eyes as he leaned in toward my freshly naked flesh, I clenched the sheets i
nto my fists, felt his tongue dart out, teasingly slow. I let out a moan as he moved his hands up my body gently. Unfortunately his tongue didn’t change tactics, his touch remaining light. I took a deep breath, fully intent on giving him orders as to what I liked, but I sighed out instead.

  I thought about how uncertain he’d been, how uncomfortable he’d acted at the thought of even kissing me. I wondered if insulting his technique would push him farther away instead of helping us both. Still tentative, he slid his hands down my thighs to my knees, dragged his fingers back to my hips, his touch still feathery.

  I felt myself getting distracted, thinking more about his unease than my own pleasure. It made me uncomfortable and it definitely killed the mood. Sliding my hand down to the top of his head, I ran my fingers through his hair, gave a tug. I shifted my thighs, arched my back, trying everything I could think of short of verbally chastising him, but he didn’t speed up or vary the pressure of his tongue.

  If this was what Chloe had been so impressed with, what she enjoyed spending days at a time suggesting I partake of, I was going to have to start seriously questioning her tastes and preferences.

  Sick of waiting for him to intuit that his mouth wasn’t getting the job done, I sighed, gave his hair a rough tug. Luckily for his fractured ego, he got that message. I watched as he kissed a line up my body, grasping my hips and sliding me further back. He crawled up my body, stopping to give my left breast some sweet attention above the line of my bra before he leaned in to kiss along my neck. Still, he was gentle, slow.

  I wanted to fuck like rabbits, to scratch his skin, squeeze his hips with my thighs, bite him, and cry out. Instead, I was one step away from a cuddle and a nap. Sick of waiting, I slid my hand between us, found his cock. I wrapped my hand around him, couldn’t quite resist giving a faint squeeze, before I shifted to angle my hips, pressed him against me. As I lifted, tried to encourage him to get on with it, I felt him take a deep breath against my skin, felt the muscles in his back tense.

  Then he was in, still slow and steady. I let out a sound of irritation, hoped he took it as pleasure, and wrapped my legs around his hips. I glowered up at the ceiling as I tried to figure out how I’d intended to seduce the hare and had ended up with the tortoise instead.

  “Faster,” I hissed and he let out a low laugh against my throat. Glad he wasn’t crushed by the order, I slid my hands to his face, turned him to kiss me. He obliged, his pace quickening, and I arched my back. Leaning away from his mouth, I raised my arms above my head, tried to find something to grab onto. Gripping the edge of the bed, I lifted my hips to match his pace, letting out a moan as my body crept right up to the edge of pleasure, eyed it gleefully.

  Abruptly, Mel stopped thrusting, lowered his mouth to my throat, trying to catch his breath against my skin. He stayed there, body tense, and I realized the tortoise had finished the race without me. Relaxing my arms, I let out a long sigh, disappointment chasing the pleasure away like it was a group of unruly teens and my body was an old man’s lawn.

  Mel seemed to have no idea anything was wrong and I wasn’t sure if I felt good about this or bad. He pulled back, gave me a goofy smile that only comes out after a man has sex, and leaned in to give me a quick kiss. I did my best to smile back, glad at least to see that he seemed to be feeling better about himself.

  “You know,” he said after a few moments. “I think you just took my re-virginity.”

  “I what?” I asked, realizing that I really just wanted to get up and out of there. I could claim I needed to clean up, I realized. The thought that we hadn’t used a condom followed and I felt myself go pale.

  “My re-virginity. That was the longest stretch of time I’d gone since I started having sex. So, clearly breaking a streak like that must net you some sort of acclaim.” He leaned into kiss me again and I turned my head. This he understood, pulling back with a frown.

  “What?” he asked, one brow up.

  “We didn’t—you didn’t hide a condom somewhere that I didn’t see, did you?”

  “Ah,” he said, pulling back enough to rest his weight on his elbows. “No, but, that’s not really an issue.”

  “I’m not worried about being pregnant, I have an IUD. But you’ve slept with a lot of women.”

  “Oh yes I have,” he said, a smirk teasing his lips. I rolled my eyes, suddenly remembered why I had refused to have sex with him in the past. “Besides, I can’t get you pregnant. I’m not in love with you.”

  “Well that’s a fine thing to say while you’re inside a woman,” I sniped, hitting him in the shoulder until he pulled back completely. I got to my feet and fled to the bathroom, yelling back, “We’ll talk about this after we’re cleaned up.”

  Chapter Sixteen

  I didn’t want to, but I came back out into the room to find Mel clean, dressed, and sitting on my bed, which he’d made for some reason. As I was naked, I glanced at the door, wondered suddenly how much of our shared activity the rest of the household knew about, and sighed. The door was shut, presumably thanks to Mel, but I still needed clothes. I crouched down to grab clean ones out of my bag, noticed that Mel was watching me with a wolfish grin. I rolled my eyes, but couldn’t help my lips tug upward.

  “Back to the problem at hand,” I said, standing as I pulled panties on. I realized I’d left the bra I’d worn during sex in the bathroom, so I dug around in my bag for another.

  “There is no problem, far as I can see. I finally got you into bed and, because we’re not mated, there’s no need to worry about pregnancy. Plus, as I’m a werewolf, there’s no need to worry about diseases. Didn’t Chloe tell you any of this?”

  “Why would—never mind. You sure about all that? You’re not gonna pass some rare form of werewolf herpes on to me?” I asked, reaching back to snap my bra on. Mel took the time to stare at my tits before he answered. I rolled my eyes, folded the bra up to cover them, stuck my arms through the straps.

  “That—of course not. There isn’t even such a thing.”

  “Okay. Then, explain the pregnancy thing again? You didn’t even make sure I was on birth control. That didn’t even come to mind?” I asked, moving to grab my pants from the back of the chair where Mel had so thoughtfully draped them.

  “Ah, it’s a chemical thing. Werewolves are sterile until we find a mate. Then, all bets are off.”

  “Even the women?” My brain picked at a vague memory of having a similar conversation with Chloe, but I wasn’t about to let Mel know he’d been right.

  “Yep.”

  “Well, that’s odd.”

  “You mean it’s awesome,” Mel said, pushing to his feet. He cross the space between us, wrapped his arms around me, and bent in close. I let him kiss me, as that was something we seemed to do well, at least. The rest of it…well, I didn’t need to clue him in on that.

  If I’d helped him get his mojo back, then so be it. One of Chloe’s selling points on sex with Mel had always been that he’d leave me alone after we’d done the nasty. Or the boring, as the case had turned out to be.

  Per my calculations in the shower, I wouldn’t have to repeat the sub par performance ever again. He would be some other poor woman’s problem. Many other poor women would have to put up with what I’d just experienced. I now knew exactly why he didn’t have the whole female population of Seattle trying to crush his windshield with a bat, though. I was betting they’d all left his bed with a similar sense of pity.

  Oh, no, it’s fine that you don’t want to sleep together again, I was sure they’d all told him. We can definitely just be friends. Friends without any sort of benefits at all. Gotta go!

  Pulling away just enough to give my lip a quick nibble, Mel opened his eyes, looked into mine. I gave him a small, blank smile and he pulled back.

  “Are you starving? I’m starving. I think we worked up an—” He jerked his head to the side and I caught his left ear twitch. “Ah, the family’s home. Just in time, it seems. I should make us lunch.” He bent down to kiss me once m
ore and I started to worry he might try to make it a habit. Maybe I could grab a random woman off the street and ask her how she’d dealt with him trying to get friendly after sex. From the way he told it, there was an eighty percent chance that any gal I closed my eyes and pointed at would have been a past partner.

  “I may just eat some cupcakes and surf the web,” I said as he hit the door. I tried to sound casual rather than hesitant at the idea of spending more time with him. Hand on the knob, he turned to me, gave an overdramatic eye roll.

  “Nonsense, you’ve had enough web for the day.” He winked like he wasn’t sure I’d get the joke without extreme confirmation. “Get decent, come out and join us.” Without waiting for me to agree he slipped out the door, shut it behind him.

  “What the hell have I done?” I mouthed. One roll in the hay and he was acting like we were married. Grabbing my shirt from where I’d dropped it, I pulled it over my head, looked around the room for my phone. When I didn’t see it, I retraced my steps, tried to figure out where I’d left it.

  It was only when I noticed my wallet on the desk that I remembered Mel had commandeered my phone in the tunnels. For all I knew it was dead, sitting in his room next to his sticky jeans. I couldn’t even call Chloe for advice.

  “Dammit,” I grumbled.

  ##

  The family and I sat around the table, the kids making enough of a ruckus that I got to remain blissfully silent. I sat two seats from the head of the table where Julian kept giving me knowing glances. Sarah was either unaware that I’d had sex with her brother-in-law or just didn’t care.